Sunday, January 10, 2010

When There Are No Words

I am having some blogging issues lately.

I don't know what to say. Or how to say it.

To write about the happiness that I feel over this baby just seems wrong and insensitive.

And there's no way I am going to grumble about how I am feeling right now. That's just irrelevant and disrespectful.

There are topics in my mind, things spinning around, but. . .

I just can't seem to get out the right words. I have started and stopped at least a dozen posts. They all sound wrong. I have started and stopped this post a handful of times.

I'm still here, still reading, still commenting, and still thinking.

I can't stop commenting, especially, because that's another thing that has me feeling so down. I posted about this last week and the comment section exploded, further proving my point. The negative, insensitive, and awful things that people are saying to each other is very disheartening. I am not talking about anything said on my blog, however, I am talking about suffering people that have been hurt even more by the thoughtless words another person has chosen to left them. It's happening all over the blogasphere, not just here in the infertility community. I read this blog, written by a young widow, and on the one year anniversary of her husband's death, someone chose to leave a comment that I am still shaking my head over. These are just two examples. I have a dozen more that come to mind, from the last week alone.

I do believe that one bad apple should not spoil the whole bunch. I am not going to stop blogging, not by any means. I just need a few days to collect my thoughts and take a breath.


Sunny said...

I followed those links -- oh WOW. Would those people say that to the bloggers face? If not, they shouldn't type it. And if they would... well, obviously they need to do some serious soul-searching about how appropriate that is.

We bloggers can get so much support from the IF community, it's almost overwhelming. It's too bad that one heartless comment can cut so deeply.

Mel said...

Post more recipes (seriously, I've tried them all and they are all amazing) or more Will-isms.
I stopped blogging publicly because of negativity. I've found that, for me, I just need to remove any form of that from my life. I am so emotional and would defend myself or someone else I care about the death if it came down to it. I just have to keep away entirely and remember that God holds vengeance for people who hurt others. I feel SAD for people who are so miserable that they have to inflict pain on others and I PRAY for those people who do the hurting. Because somewhere along the way I suppose someone hurt them, too. And that is just the saddest part of all.

Thank you for being you.

Anonymous said...

You're human--of course you have happy moments and uncomfortable moments. Will some posts sting to read? Of course. But this is your place to express yourself, and you should feel free to write about whatever is on your mind.

Commenters, on the other hand, seem to forget all too easily that they are in somebody's virtual home.

Amanda said...

But this is your blog about you and your life. You shouldn't feel as if you can't write about your joys. You also shouldn't feel as if you can't "grumble" if you feel like it.

Honestly, the beautiful things (like the miracle baby you're raising and the miracle baby you're growing) in life are part of what's helping me get through my miscarriage right now. Truly.

I left this on MoJo's blog and it's worth repeating here, I'm always floored at the unbelievably idiotic things that come out of people's mouths when it comes to a loss. I wish there was a known rule of if-you-can't-say-something-nice-just-say-"i'm sorry".

As generous as the human heart can be, the human mind some times just seems to screw it all to hell. Think before you speak people! (or type)

Danifred said...

People will never cease to amaze me. What is wrong with people?
Luckily (knock on wood) I've avoided the trolls, but I know that one day they will come.
I just don't understand why people don't have more productive things to do with their lives. I feel sorry for them, really.

Rebecca said...

Wow...that's all I can say. I appreciate you pointing this out as I may not realize how heartless some people can be. Wow...