Well, my dear readers (or at least those of you who don't read my private blog), I have a confession.
I have been holding out on you a bit.
I am so sorry, but I didn't really have a choice. I couldn't make this public on this blog until I had a chance to make it public with my boss and colleagues.
Well, if you haven't guessed by now. . .
I am pregnant.
I had an ultrasound last week which showed a perfect little baby, with a gorgeous little heartbeat, and a fantastic due date of October 12, though this little one will likely make an appearance at 36-37 weeks, based on my past issues with HELLP (http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmedhealth/PMH0001892/) and the fact that I am already spilling a tiny bit of protein in my urine as well as having some platelet issues that they will be monitoring as my pregnancy progresses. I am currently 11 weeks, three days pregnant. Everything looks wonderful so far, and though we aren't Facebook-public yet, now that my boss knows, I wanted to also share with you here.
To answer the questions that I am sure you will have:
1) No, this wasn't planned.
2) Yes, I was on the pill. AND we used a condom (because I have a history of ovulating while on birth control). And we DTD no where near when I would usually ovulate. This baby is MEANT to be! :)
3) I will continue to work after a very brief maternity leave (brief because I will not have been at my new job for a year and am therefore not eligible for FMLA, but of course, will be eligible for the 8 weeks of medical leave for the c-section).
4) Our nanny is thrilled and willing to take on a third baby (THANK GOODNESS!).
5) We are moving. We bought a new home with a much-needed fourth bedroom. We close April 25 and plan on moving in the next day.
6) Initially, I was very surprised, to put it mildly. I was very overwhelmed with the timing, since I had just returned to work. I was afraid of how my boss would react, but he was very happy for us and 100% supportive (recall that I worked for him before and he knows our history).
7) After the intial feelings of "Wh-wh-wh-what?", I have now moved on to the thrilled stage. For a woman who once stood in a Hallmark store wondering if I would ever have a child to buy me a birthday card that said Mom on it, to having three children that I will be celebrating birthdays with?? Well, let's just say that my experiences with infertility taught me one thing: Babies are not a guarantee. They are a miracle and not to be taken for granted. I know how much work three children will be, but I also know, without a second of doubt, they will bring so much more in love and joy than can ever be measured.
8) This little one will complete our family. I will deliver via planned c-section and will have my tubes tied at the same time. After a rough start and then a pretty darn commendable run, if I do say so myself, this baby machine is closing for business after Baby #3 exits the premises.
9) We told Will and Emma after the ultrasound revealed a healthy bubba. Emma, of course, is oblivious. Will was a bit trepidatious at first (he told me that I am too old to have a baby!), but he has now made his demands for a baby brother known ("I already have one sister, I don't need another one!") and wants to name his brother Caleb (not sure where the name inspiration came from, but while I kind of like it, M is a definite NO on Caleb).
10) If my intuition continues to serve me well, Will is going to get his wish. This pregnancy is very much like Will's. I have been lightheaded, have passed out a couple of times, and am already showing (yes, I will take some belly pics and share them here). Seriously, I look about five months pregnant. I have been my usual lovely pukey mess, but NOT as pukey as I was with Emma. And my cravings and aversions are more along the lines of what I had with Will. However, I would not be the first woman to be fooled by intuition AND we will be thrilled with whatever God has blessed us with.
So, that's my little update for you. I know a pregnancy announcement (especially an unplanned one) can be a painful thing, depending on where you are in your infertility journey. Please know that, despite our surprise at this development, I am still beyond grateful for the opportunity to carry this child and can't wait to be a mommy to three children!