L&D Mystery

It's a long story and yesterday was an even longer day, but basically, they have no idea why I am bleeding. After the bleeding turned red, a trip to L&D yielded the following. . .

Possibly an irritated cervix.

Possibly a slight tear in the placenta, but too small to measure (???).

There is no collected blood up by the cervix, which is good.

Baby Boy is doing fine, moving and grooving, heart beating appropriately.

The bleeding never really got much heavier and seems to have stopped altogether now.

I am still on bedrest throughout the weekend with a follow up appointment this Tuesday. The doctor on call seemed to think that irritated cervix was the most likely cause, seeing that I had a lot of swelling last week (none of my shoes fit, I had to take off my rings, and my feet bruised) and am on my feet for work pretty much all day. He said that the cervix can get bruised just like any other part of the body when it swells and that with all of the extra blood flow to the area, bleeding can be a common result. We hadn't had. . . ahem. . .you know for a few weeks, and we are definitely restricted now, so it wasn't related to that (a girl can only wish, right?).

There was a small something on the placenta, but it was so small that they don't think that it could be causing any problems. If it was the cause of the bleed, then it was already resolving itself. The amniotic fluid levels looks fine, right in the average range, although I am under strict instructions to drink water as if it's my job for the next few days.

So, all of that to say, they don't really know. I'd have to say, honestly, no one seems that concerned. I even feel a bit sheepish for being so alarmed, but you know, bleeding + pregnancy has never equalled good things for me.

Thank you for the outpouring of love, support, and prayers. I cried reading through the sweet comments. This community is the greatest.

No

Pink spotting. Not red. Pink. No cramps. Felt Baby Boy just a little bit ago.

Doctor says straight to bed and lots of fluids. If it turns red, cramping starts, or his movements don't seem the same, I go to L&D.

Please, God, please. Let this stop. Let my baby be okay.

No Thorns Here

Sanan at Why Me has honored me with this:




You can click this link to read more about the origins of this award. The gist of this award to is pass it on to a person that has inspired you and a person that is going through a rough patch and needs some inspiration. Thank you, Sanan, for your nomination, I truly appreciate your kind words.

Kathy immediately springs to mind as someone who has inspired me. Although all of my blogger pals give me hope each and every day, Kathy and her family are a true inspiration of living and growing through loss. The way that Kathy handled first her pregnancy with Molly Marie and then the loss of her sweet girl, simply humbles me. Her grace, peace, and love for her daughter are awe inspiring.

Ally just had a D&C yesterday. She is a strong woman but I know how horrible the days following a D&C can be. And today is her birthday. So, Ally, I want you to know that you are not alone and that there are so many of us loving you, thinking of you, and praying for your lost angels right now.

Faux Paws

I think our furry children are in for a rough ride with Junior on the way.

Our oldest and smallest dog will probably take it the hardest. He has been around longer than all of the others and is extremely jealous of anything that takes our attention. If he is cuddling comfortably with me, for example, and my husband gives attention to our other dog or (even more horrifying) the cat, he will scramble over and stick his nose in the middle to get his lovin'.

Lately, as the baby moves more and more, I have taken to talking to him more and more. When he is moving, I talk to him about all sorts of things, including what a wonderful Baby he is and how much he is loved. Well, I think that I might talk to him in the same slightly higher pitched voice that I use to address the dogs. It drives our little dog crazy.

If I am sitting on the bed or couch, he will jump up and snuggle in, trying to nudge my hands off of my belly and turn my attention back his direction. If I am standing, he will prance around at my feet, anxiously whining and barking. My husband thinks this is funny, but it worries me a little about how he will be when the baby is actually here, and my focus will shift entirely.

Now, mind you, I can't see our furbabies getting completely neglected. But for our entire marriage, they have been the focus of our parental love and affection. They get a lot of attention. While I still plan on giving them the love and care that they need, until the dust settles, we are all going to be in for a readjustment.

We have read the books about acclimating animals and babies. We know to bring a blanket or piece of clothing home from the hospital prior to Baby's arrival. We know not to leave them unattended with Baby within their reach. We know to make introductions slowly and not expect a baby love-at-first-site-fest.

Hopefully, the dust will not billow for long, and we will all be settling into our new routines. I just hope the fur doesn't fly in the meantime.

Some Thing That Won't Help Matters

I heard about this on the radio yesterday morning.

With my recent weight gain, I won't be heading to my local 31 Flavors today.

But even if I wasn't worried about gaining a healthy amount of weight, I have very mixed feelings about this type of promotion.

See, not that long ago, had I heard about this, my response would have been, "Those preggers already have a baby. I am the one who needs the free ice cream."

I wish that they would have a Clomid Cup or IVF Ice Cream Day. What about introducing a new flavor - Miscarriage Mocha Chip and everyone that has miscarried never has to pay for it. Ever. What about Retrieval Rum Ripple? I know I certainly would have enjoyed a free cone on the way home from egg retrieval.

I know that most people don't consider infertility something to celebrate. I couldn't disagree more. I felt that each day that I survived, whether it was CD1 or CD 257, was a true miracle. There were so many times that I didn't even want to get out of bed, let alone do all of the other necessary things to get through the day. Yet I did. Somehow.

Now that I am pregnant and seem to be staying that way, I feel as if I deserve recognition far less than I did during my darkest hours. It was then that I really needed someone to say, "Here. Here is your free ice cream. Let's celebrate the fact that you got out of bed today."

So, because I don't own my own ice cream store, here is a free cone for every one of you. Feel free to pass it on. In honor of infertility, this is a special cone, guaranteed to:

Never melt or drip

Contain absolutely no calories or fat grams

Magically turn into your favorite flavor

*Also, for my GD friends, it will not cause any disturbance to your glucose levels!

Weighty Matters

First off, thank you for your support yesterday. I felt kind of bad blogging about weight gain. I mean, really? Weight gain? Have I come that far that I am going to go on about something so completely irrelevant?

I guess the answer is yes (but I still feel whiny about it). Part of the problem is (was) that I hadn't been gaining a lot of weight up to this point. If it had been the steady, one-pound per week gain that is quoted in all of my pregnancy books, then perhaps it wouldn't have knocked the wind out of my sails. Each time I have been in, I have not looked forward to my meeting with The Scale, but each time, the nurse has smiled as she wrote down the number and assured me that I am doing great with the gain. In fact, last time, they even encouraged me to add some more fat into my diet, since I had gained so little.

Yesterday, after weighing me, there was no smile. Instead, she wrote the number down and asked if my eating habits had changed dramatically in the past month. Then, she told me that while overall, my weight gain is good, this past month's eight pound jump is not okay.

The thing is that I don't feel as if I have been eating that much differently than at any other time during my pregnancy (first trimester excluded when I couldn't eat at all). My appetite has increased lately, but I am eating really healthy stuff. My current craving is fruit, namely mangoes and watermelon. I have had to throw an extra snack in during the afternoon, but I usually do a yogurt or granola bar.

So, I am obviously not wanting to repeat another such increase at next month's weigh in. And not purely for superficial reasons, either. I don't want an unhealthy weight gain to negatively affect the baby's health. But in reviewing my habits of the past month, I really don't know what to change. I tried taking out the afternoon snack yesterday, and then I was so hungry, I ate more than usual at dinnertime.

My husband and I have been more active lately, with the weather getting nicer. We are getting out with the dogs, walking, taking them to dog park, etc. I walk a fair amount for work and now that the fainting seem to be a thing of the past, I choose the stairs instead of the elevator. Still, I could probably put more activity into my schedule.

Has anyone else faced this issue? How have you handled increased appetite and weight gain? Have you had a jump one month only to return to "normal" gain the next?

The Truth Hurts

I had my 25-week OB appointment today.

It went well. We heard the lovely sound of Little Man's heartbeat. I measured correctly (still a week ahead overall). Next month will be my 1-hour GT screen and then we start going every two weeks.

The only hiccup is that I am gaining weight - which I guess is a no-brainer, but still bothers me a tad. I am right on track for where I should be for a 30 - 35 pound weight gain. That just seems like so much. But as my husband said, "You can't have a healthy baby and not gain weight."

True.