Some Days

Do you ever have a day when you wish you would have just stayed in bed?

That day was yesterday.

This post is going to be unapologetically whiny. If you want to skip it, I completely understand. In fact, I'd recommend it.

I woke up feeling sick and headachey. I am so done with second trimester all-day-sickness. Please don't misunderstand me, this baby is worth it and I am grateful to be pregnant. This is a small price to pay for a lifetime of miracles with this child. Unfortunately, that doesn't make getting through each and every day with a very active toddler any easier right now. Some days are better than others when it comes to the sickness and yesterday was not a good one.

We had coffee/playdate plans with some girlfriends their kiddos and, honestly, it is sometimes just easier to work through the nasty-yucky feelings and get going. I tried (and failed) at keeping some breakfast down, got us ready, and we headed out.

Playtime was good for Will and he had a fun time. I suffered through it, making several trips to the bathroom. In addition to my unrelenting nausea, I started having these pressure-cramp pains which didn't really worry me (I had them at exactly the same gestation with Will - thank goodness for my blog), but were still irritating and distracting.

After leaving the coffee-place, my girlfriend who is 20 weeks pregnant, was dying for a corndog (it's $1 Tuesdays, after all). We headed to the mall. I was so proud of myself for remembering to put together a check and self-addressed stamped envelope for tickets we were sending away for the Valentine's Day Train we want to take Will on this weekend. It had to be sent today so I had the envelope with me and decided to take it into the mall and mail it from their mailbox so that I could check it off of my to do list. We went to the food court, the kids and my friend ate lunch, and then. . .

I couldn't find the envelope. Which contained a check. Which had to be mailed today. To get on the train (because they apparently run an old-school business that doesn't even have a fax machine).

Yeah, we looked everywhere, including the nasty trash can. We never found it. And we went from the car to the food court, which isn't far. It is one of life's mysteries how I managed to lose that check in 20 minutes and 150 feet. So, one canceled check later, a hopeful call to the train to see if they could hold our tickets there rather than mail them back to us (nope), we are not going to be able to go on the train, and we are out $25 for a canceled check fee.

By the time we got home, Will was grumpy and past his nap. I was grumpy, in need of some food to stay down and a nap of my own. But I am still working (another story there of why I haven't quit) and had to do that. I got into it with a coworker (not my boss and not someone I am accountable to) that felt I hadn't done my job properly. I managed to keep my brain-mouth filter in check and was polite, but still irritated at being called out for something that was not my fault.

Then, M called to say that he had scheduled an appointment with a security vendor to come at 6 PM. The house was "clean" (after my weekend cleaning spree) but not "guest clean." I worked on that, while Will grumped at me (his nap was not nearly long enough and he was still tired) from his playroom. I still hadn't managed to keep anything down and was not in my greatest mom-mode ever. He wanted me to read, I needed to vacuum. He wanted me to dance, I needed to empty the sink full of dishes. He wailed piteously from his playroom, "Mama, story. . . . Mama, dance. . ." I hate it when I have to do mundane chores instead of pay attention to my son, but a girls' gotta do what a girls' gotta do, and fortunately, it doesn't happen very often.

M came home and I was exhausted, hungry (but still sick to my stomach), and irritable and the afforementioned brain-mouth filter was decidedly not in check by this point. When he a little snappy with me, I snapped right back, and seconds before the vendor arrived, we were snarking at each other. Lovely. While M dealt with the vendor, I fed Will dinner, entertained him, and gave him his tubby, all the while wishing someone would feed me dinner and put me to bed!

Yeah, that wasn't gonna happen.

The vendor didn't leave until almost 10, which is when I realized that I hadn't eaten anything (that stayed put) all day. I attempted an apple (nope, food also isn't gonna happen), got into bed, realizing that it was just one of those days that might have gone better if I had just stayed there. There is the small matter of one toddler, however, who definitely wouldn't have allowed that to happen. And who makes even days like yesterday worth it.

And, after all, today is a new day.