Thursday, September 6, 2007

Morning Stretching With HPTs

Day 13.

This is kind of my D Day. Or B Day. Or whatever. This is the day I have always had my BFPs by. Always. So, in my mind, using these sensitive tests, I just know that if it's negative at this point, I am not pregnant.

And this morning's test refuses to cooperate with me. That darn minus won't turn into a plus. I have tried tilting the test. Nothing. I have tried climbing on my bathroom counter to look at the test directly under a bright light. Negative.

I then thought, "Hmm, natural light might help me see it better." So, I climbed into my bathtub (it's the in the corner of the bathroom and it's the only way to reach the windows) and pulled open the blinds enough to let a shaft of light shine onto the test and. . . minus sign.

So, there I was in the bathtub, with the negative test in my hand and I crouched into the empty whiteness and huddled there for a minute. I was praying, I was hoping, I was bargaining with God, I was WILLING that test to turn positive. And still it remains stubbornly one lined.

I am not pregnant.


Polka Dot said...

oh hon I'm sorry.

And I know I hate it when other women say this but ...

It's not too late. My RE is adamant about not testing before 14dpiui. And remember - at 13dpiui my home test would have been negative as my beta was only at 20 on day 14.

Sure, steel yourself for the bad news (isn't that our way?). But don't let your hope wilt completely.


Samantha said...

I am sorry.