I should have known that it was too good to last. I was fortunate enough to be able to use a combination of sick days, vacation days, and company paid holidays to get two and a half weeks off of work. This was a benefit that most people don't have and I am grateful for the time off.
But it is really hard to come back to work.
I am in sales and it is a stressful job. I was promoted to a new position last February, but really started in the field in June after a long training period. I love my job itself. I adore the company that I work for, I am proud of the products that I represent, and I love interacting with our customers. Like any job, however, it has it's downsides.
One of which is that my boss comes to work with me about once a quarter. Now, I actually like my boss, and the worksessions aren't that bad once she gets in the car with me and we get going. But the days before are murderous. I am obsessive about getting two "perfect" days set up and really knock myself ou getting ready for her arrival. Because I am still so new to the position, I am also still in the "proving myself" phase. Since she does work with me so infrequently, I feel extra pressure to perform well, as that will be the impression that she has of me for the next couple of months before she works with me again. She is working with me next week.
The other stressful thing is traveling. Now, I am pretty lucky and don't have to do too much of it. However, we have a couple of big meetings coming up. These meetings are rather strange for anyone who has never been to a salesy-type meeting. We have to practice using our selling skills and materials in "role plays," which means you have to stand up in front of your entire region and pretend to sell to a pretend customer - with your peers, boss, and regional manager looking on.
And then there is one other issue . . . and this is my fault. There is a lot of paperwork. I used to be good with keeping up with it. But there is a LOT more paperwork with this new position and I have been spending a lot of time getting to know my new customers. And, if I am completely honest, I have also been focused on getting and staying pregnant, which has taken some of the time that I used to devote to keeping up with the mountains of paperwork. So, I feel as if I am constantly playing catch up with the administrative side of my job. Just thinking about all that I have to do is making my pulse raise. I can practically feel my blood pressure rising. . .
On top of that, a bit of the queasies are setting in. I am mid-week five, so that makes sense. It's completely manageable so far, but it's still there, like a lump in my throat.
But I had a nice break. Time to get back to work!