Saturday, December 15, 2007

Incredibly Blessed & A Decision To Make

Sunday, December 16, 2007

I have really been enjoying my resting phase, which was made even more incredible by our wonderful neighbors and good friends. We have been amazed by the outpouring of support, from the lovely comments on here (which I am printing as keepsakes), to calls and e-mails from friends and family, to the "catered" dinners which keep appearing like magic.

Our good friends who live next door have just gone above and beyond. It started on Friday night when they brought over pot roast, mashed potatoes, and a beautiful snowman cake that she had made and iced herself. Then, they brought dinner again last night, chicken, rice, and a huge heart-shaped chocolate chip cookie with "Happy Baby Day" in chocolate icing. Just when I thought it couldn't get any better (or tastier), they arrived with homemade crepes and french toast for breakfast this morning. I don't think that we can ever repay them for their hard work and kindness.

Even if this doesn't work, I will always treasure the kindness and love that has surrounded us. I will be disappointed, of course, but I will know how truly blessed we are to have people care of us as much as they do.

We have also been further blessed by a call from Dr. M's office yesterday. Three more blastocysts are frozen now, for a total of five. That means enough for TWO more FETs, should this not work. The miracles just keep coming.

Now, the question remains: When do we have our first beta?

As the clinic is closed on the 24th, they have agreed to let us come in early on the 23rd (just a week from today!) to have our first beta. Of course, I was thrilled, but my husband is not so eager. He is concerned that if we found out that it was a negative, it would ruin Christmas. He asked if we could come in on the 26th for our first beta instead, and they said that it was up to us. I understand his reasoning. Last Christmas, the loss of Gummy Bear made Christmas really sad. He doesn't want to have two bad Christmases in a row. However, I just keep thinking how wonderful Christmas would be if it was positive. And if it's negative, I don't want to keep fooling myself (or doing anymore unnecessary injections).

So, we are at cross purposes. Ultimately, he has left the decision up to me. Bah. I hate that. What do you all think?


Samantha said...

Congrats on the transfer and the number of blasts! That's really great!

That's a tough choice with the beta. I'm hesitant to give advice, because I think you should follow your heart and do what's best for you and your husband. As much as waiting a little longer would drive me crazy, I think if I were in your position, I'd wait. But you may feel better doing otherwise.

A'Dell said...

I am waiting until the 26th for mine. Granted, you've invested far more in this cycle than I have.

But, I know how a negative beta makes me feel. I don't want to feel that way on Christmas - however great or small the possibility.

Anonymous said...

Yay for two more blastocysts! And what wonderful people you have to support you with yummy meals right now!

I think I'm with your husband on this one. I HATE waiting, hate it. But since it's Christmas, I think waiting until the 26th would be my choice. Christmas will still be full of celebration and anticipation if you wait until the 26th, but if you do it on the 23rd, there's a slight chance it could put a downer on the celebrations. That said, if you do it on the 23rd there's a chance that Christmas would be THAT MUCH more wonderful and celebratory. You've got yourself in a pickle, my dear. Good luck with whatever you decide. :)

AwkwardMoments said...

what awesome people you have living next door to you!

I am a follow your heart and gut kind of girl.

Von said...

You don't need another Christmas ruined. And while there is every chance in the world it will be good news I don't think it's worth the risk.
It's only 48 hours.
Enjoy your Christmas together and the possibility of what might be.
I am certain the 26th will bring an extra Christmas present for you.

Anonymous said...

There is a great chance that you could get the best present ever. But if it the beta is negative, it will make for a miserable Christmas. I say wait until later in the week to decide. If you have serious symptoms that this may have worked, you may want to go on the 23rd.

Christy said...

You are, indeed, incredibly blessed. What wonderful neighbors you have!

As for your decision, how about waiting until it is closer to decide? Part of the roller coaster that is IVF includes good and bad days during the dreaded wait. A "right" decision could very well come to you during this time.

Geohde said...

Go for the beta when you feel ready for the answer.

I know that's an irritating response, but it depends on how much the wait vs the knowlegde will affect your Christmas.

I've always been an information-early type of girl,


Debby said...

Oh i'm horrible at decisions too! Wish I had some advice for you...but I'm sure you'll figure out what's best. Good luck with your little embryos!!!

Kim said...

That's a really hard choice. I suppose that I'd make this Christmas a celebration of your family and whatever that may someday include... really enjoy it, really love one another, and then face the music the next day. If it's positive, then you'll be entering a great, new year.

Polka Dot said...

That is awesome news! This is all so exciting. And your neighbors? Gah ... we need to clone them.

I can't say when to do the beta. Part of me says it'd be a beyond perfect Christmas gift if it's positive. But then part of me says it'd really ruin a holiday if it's not. I can't tell you what you should do, but I'd probably wait until after the holiday just for the suspicion factor - if I were negative, I'd rather go through the holiday with the hope vs the disappointment.

Tracy said...

I think everybody's perspective may be a bit different on this one. I think I'd wait until the 26th. You'd have another 2 days of hope...

I like Jo's comment, too. You don't need to decide today, do you?