Thursday, May 29, 2008

A Saturday in August

I lived in fear of putting dates on the calendar for a long time with this pregnancy. With so many lost angels, there are a lot of circled and scratched out dates in my dayplanners of the past.

When friends and family started asking about showers, I put them off as long as I could. It wasn't that I didn't want the showers, but I didn't want empty dates with no meaning, yet all of the meaning in the world. I already have more of those than I care to think about.

The birth center where I will deliver also requires a Labor & Delivery prep class, which includes the infamous hospital tour. I got a reminder in the mail two weeks ago that I needed to sign up soon, because they like you to have the class completed by 34 weeks. That's August 1, ladies and gentleman. Barely two months away.

My husband's best friend and his wife want to get a cabin in the mountains for a weekend this summer. Since it's a couple of hours from here and no where near a good hospital, we know that we should also do that relatively soon.

All of these dates coming so fast made me realize that it was time to sit down with the calendar. I started putting in all of the dates for the four (yes, four, we are blessed more than I can even begin to say) showers, the classes, the tour, the weekend away, and I started realizing that this summer is going to be over before I know it. I was looking at the page for August and my eyes kept drifting down to August 30. Would you even believe that until yesterday, I didn't even know that August 30 was a Saturday? I just never let myself look that far ahead.

I started to close the calendar and then I realized that I still needed to put one last date on the page. I even switched from the ball point pen that I had been using to a red Sharpie. First, I circled the date. Then, I wrote in capital letters: "Baby Boy Due." I looked at the page for a few minutes. My heart was actually beating faster than usual and I felt a little tug of remorse at my boldness.

This is silly, of course, because this date is emblazoned in my mind, regardless of being on any physical calendar. But just putting it there, seeing it there, was a big step for me.

16 comments:

Kathy V said...

It will com quicker than you think. I did tear up when you pulled out the sharpie though. ( I guess it is hormones) But still that is just so special.

Joy said...

Good for you!!! You've got to put your fear on the back burner and take these leaps of faith. How exciting to have those dates penned out and yes, the time will fly!

Fertilized said...

GO YOU!! I started writing dates down in May for all our events, weddings, showers, graduations etc... It's the 29th, I flipped my calendar to see what is planned for june ..... weekly NST's and a 30th due date .......... HOLY BATMAN ...Can this even be happening?? That's how i feel

I am so proud and excited for you conquering that calendar

Busted said...

I think it is wonderful that you were able to write that date down. It will be over before you know it, and he will be here.

Tracy said...

I know what you mean. We're having my shower early because we're afraid of future increased bed rest and to accomodate my mother-in-law who lives out of state. I still catch myself thinking, "But, what if..."

I'm so proud of you for assuming the best and using a Sharpie to signify that, no less.

Amy said...

Um, yeah, go ahead and circle 2 weeks before that date b/c you know you will be sooo over it by 38 weeks! HA! But I do give you props for thinking you will make it to 40! LOVE YOU!

K @ ourboxofrain said...

I don't even like to schedule my appointments in advance, but also don't want to end up with the worst times. Congrats for embracing the realities of this all and conquering the fear of the calendar!

(Side question: isn't July 19 the 34 week point for you, with August 2 being 36 weeks?)

Waiting Amy said...

Good for you, Katie! I'm glad you're able to celebrate this time a bit.

I too am shocked how quickly time is flying and don't know how it will all get done! Better get back to work!

Mel said...

I am so happy you were able to do this... have faith.
And, if he comes early on say, August 27th or so, he will share a birthday with your coolest blogger friend ever, ME!
*hugs*

Jen said...

Time is just cruising by. I mean you're almost to the 3rd tri of all things!

And wow your hospital requires a class. Mine does not but I'll probably take one anyhow. Luckily it's very comprehensive and includes information on not only the labor and delivery process but what to do with this new being once you bring them home. After focusing so hard on getting pregnant, I've suddenly realized that I have no clue as to what to actually do with a baby!

Nicky said...

You're braver than me. The most I've been able to bring myself to do is to mark things that are within the next month. So, any milestones in June are on my calendar, but July and August? Not yet....

Jen said...

Way to go! Writing it all down seems so hard to me. I am very proud!

Chris said...

Good for you for taking such a big step! I'm so proud of you! You are right though, the dates are permanently emblazoned upon your mind, so you may as well put it in writing and enjoy the countdown.

Antigone said...

You're so close. So soon we'll see a photo of your little one.

Geohde said...

I have to confess that I haven't got my EDD written down anywhere yet....

J

Adriane said...

I haven't marked mine yet, either. I started inputting shower dates, etc., and actually marked Week 27, Week 28, etc. I got to Week 30 and stopped. I couldn't bring myself to go further than that.

I am so glad you put the dates on your calendar!!! Red Sharpie, too! A great step, Katie! I feel inspired. :-)