Sunday, March 16, 2008

Name Game

Well, I don't know what we are naming the baby. Since we are only 16 weeks (today!) that isn't much of a problem. I am hoping it will be easier once we know what flavor of baby this is.

The other thing we are talking about is not telling people what the name is once we have chosen it. This post about my mother's reaction to our chosen middle name for a boy kind of explains why. Her hyena-laughter response is the strongest we've gotten, but it's not unusual that people to feel completely comfortable telling you exactly what they think about your ideas for names.

When naming comes up, people also love to interject their own suggestions. And then they get their feelings hurt if you don't want to use them. Or if you share what you are thinking about for potential names, they can think of a nasty ex-boyfriend that had that name, or the bratty girl in their second grade class that was always getting in trouble. It's open season when you haven't decided on a name, or even if you have decided on a name, as long as the baby isn't born. It actually bothers my husband more than it bothers me, but I still don't enjoy the name game.

So we have pretty much decided that we will not share the name that we have decided on until the baby is born. It has the dual benefit of not only being a surprise, but also hopefully safeguards us from the well-meaning suggestions and/or opinions.

I do have one name I'd like to share with you today. That is the name of my new favorite thing in the whole. wide. world. Sleeping has been getting a little less comfortable these past few weeks. I was never a back sleeper prior to pregnancy, but lately, I have been waking up on my back, panicked at what blood flow or oxygen supply I might have stolen from the baby. I have tried wedging pillows around me and even tying tennis balls between my shoulder blades.

Last night, my husband came home with this. At first, I was suspicious, especially when I saw the receipt and how much it cost. But after just one night with my new friend, I am a convert. It's worth every single penny. I slept better last night than I have in weeks. It was incredibly comfortable, so much so than the mountains of pillows that I was forever readjusting. It also kept me from rolling onto my back. Heavenly.


infertility just sucks said...

I feel the same way about names - we decided a long time ago that nobody gets to be a part of the discussion except for us.

Even if people hold can manage to hold their tongue they still usually make a face.

Kim said...
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Kim said...

The best advice that I could ever given ANY pregnant woman is to NEVER share the name until the baby is born.

We got a LOT of rude comments, and my own sister even said 'I won't be an aunt to a kid with that name' (well, she IS an aunt to a kid with that name!). And B's name isn't even that strange... lol. People just lack class, but it's much more difficult for them to be rude in front of an adorable brand new baby.

Tracy said...

Well done, hubby! :) Scott came home with a body pillow for me the other day, too, but mine isn't nearly as cool as yours.

We aren't going to share our names, either. Too many opinionated people in our families.

Fertilized said...

Points for the hubster!!!

AS for names - i have a few i like - i have shared with a few. I am not telling people when/if we decide. People will know our lil one's name the day of delivery.

Waiting Amy said...

So funny -- I just went out today desparate for a body pillow! The last few nights have been terrible and the only place I could get comfy was on the couch. I got the Snoogle, also ridiculously expensive. But I'm hoping it does the trick!

As for names, I too am reluctant to share. My mom is notorious for sneering. Plus, I think we will likely have more than one picked out. When we had The Snake, there were 2 choices and he really did look more like one than the other.

Freyja said...

My coworker's wife is 17 or 18 weeks right now. They have their gender scan soon. I made the mistake of asking if they have any names yet and my coworker got kind of snippy and told me they "aren't telling" and eyed me suspiciously as if he was sure I'd stolen his dog or something...

Ms. J said...

What a sweet gift! That was very thoughtful of him :o)

I can certainly understand about not wanting to share the baby name(s) with others. My cousin & her husband has selected "Bailey" for their daughter when she was about 6 months along in the pregnancy. Then 2 months later they said they wanted to switch to "Maya". WELL, her mother had a fit, whining "I LIKE BAILEY!" The whole thing was ridiculous. I felt so bad for my cousin. Now of course, everything is fine, and my aunt acts like "Maya" is the greatest name ever, LOL.

My husband and I have always joked that we would tell people a truly off-the-wall name, like "Bertha" (apologies if anyone reading this is a Bertha, but it's NOT a popular modern baby name) just to throw folks off their rocker, hee hee.

Katie said...

I am glad that we are not the only ones with this problem! It will be really difficult to not tell certain people, especially those that have been really supportive. But we are not going to say the "real" reason why - we are going to say that we want a surprise since we are knowing the sex. Hopefully, that keeps people at bay!

Mel said...

You are so right on with your notion not to share the name. No good ever comes out of it-once the baby is here no one can say a word!!
Glad you finally got some sleep!!