I don't talk a lot about my job here on the blog. For one thing, I have known other bloggers to get in trouble with employers for doing so. For another thing, I feel that I have a lot to be thankful for when it comes to my career. I work for a great company that is well-respected. If I told you which company, every single one of you (regardless of country where you live) would know of it by name.
I love what I do itself. I have great customers and fabulous products to sell. I believe 100% that what I do matters.
But sometimes, having a job sucks. No doubt, half of what I am upset about is reality and the other half is comprised of the hormonal overload that I am experiencing right now. Little things seem to get blown out of proportion and the bigger things get even bigger. I always have taken my job seriously and I take pride in doing it well. So, when I get called on the carpet for something that I haven't done right, it gets to me under the best of circumstances. But when I get in trouble for something that I actually took care of. . . Well, grrr.
My company is a large company and most of its sales force works from a home office. This means that in order to keep everyone happy and accounted for, there are a lot of Lists. Lists of calls made, calls entered, compliance tests taken and scored, the List of Lists goes on and on. One of my main objectives is to never be on a bad list. There are a lot of bad lists, so from time to time, I have found myself on one. It just happens.
However, yesterday, I ended up on two Bad Lists. The worst thing is that I completed both of the activities that the lists say that I didn't do. One was a compliance test and one was a survey about my personal competencies. They were both time-consuming and I made sure to do both of them before the deadlines, yet I show up on lists of people that did not do them. It is beyond frustrating.
Luckily, I have proof that I did one of them, but the other is kind of a "they said/I said." And the they saids are winning. It just irritates me that I have to defend myself when I work hard and make an honest effort to get things done.
This also was brought to my attention at the beginning of the day-long conference, which has me on my feet for hours on end. It was also brought to my attention in front of my colleagues. This combined to make it even worse than it would usually be.
I am proud that I didn't end up in tears in front of everyone, but I am still upset about it. There is just something about not being trusted that really gets to me.