Saturday, April 25, 2009

Here I Am

Where to begin?

Probably an apology would be best: I am sorry for stepping away for a bit and worrying quite a few of my bloggy friends. Thanks for the comments, e-mails, Face.book check ins, and even phone calls wondering if we are okay. It means a lot to me to know that you care. So a sincere thank you from the bottom of my heart is also in order.

Bottom line is that yes, we are okay.

But there have been a few things going on and, honestly, we are not doing great.

First and foremost: Will is fine. However, he never really recovered from his virus of a couple weeks ago and another trip to the doctor revealed double ear infections, sinusitis, and possibly pneumonia (we are still waiting for the radiologist to formally review the x-rays). Two and a half weeks with a very sick baby have not been fun. Fortunately, I have not gotten any of the creeping crud, I just feel pretty run down after many nights of little to no sleep and constant nursing. It has literally been a return to the newborn days.
I wish that I could say that he was feeling better, but not yet. Hopefully, soon. Poor Little Man.

Also, I haven't been able to write about (and still really can't) the other thing that has been troubling me. M and I just aren't getting along very well lately. In what I consider a rather ironic twist, now that we have Will and the drama of conception and sustaining a pregnancy are in the past, it seems as if our relationship is faltering. I know that many new parents face this, but there is a lot more to it than I can write about here, for the privacy of my marriage and my husband. Suffice to say that things aren't going well and it honestly breaks my heart.

Add to that the regular blah blah blah of life, and it's just been a rough few weeks. But I have been reading (if not commenting) when I have had a few free moments. There have been some wonderful things going on in the community lately and I am so glad for all of the miracles that are out there.




19 comments:

Fertilized said...

no apologies necessary. Sick baby + life + blah blah explains it all.

Praying that Will does not have any more ailments and that things start to fall into place for you.

Road Blocks and Roller Coasters said...

I hope that Will gets better soon, sweetie. Its so hard when they are sick since they are so small and just can't communicate the way we need them to to make it all better.

And you are definitely not alone on the marriage front. This has been an incredibly difficult transition for us for a variety of reasons. We just try to take every day one day at a time and I try to keep it all in perspective--as much as we may irritate one another (irritate is a nice word at this point), we chose to commit to each other for a reason. That's got to count for something, right?

((LOTS AND LOTS OF HUGS)) and many good wishes coming your way.

Jen said...

No need to apologize, things happen.

I hope Will gets all better soon and life settles back to normal for all of you.

Tracy said...

Katie, I agree...no apologies needed.

I'm sorry you're having a rough stretch right now. As always, I'm always just a click away, and if you want to talk via phone, I'm here for you that way, too.

Big hugs...

Joy said...

I was hoping you were okay, too, but figured you were on vacation. This seems like anything BUT vacation and I'm sorry you've hit a rough patch.

*HUGS*

Rachel said...

Bother - I was also hoping that you were away on a fabulous vacation somewhere. I hope things improve soon.

Polka Dot said...

I'm sorry it's been so tough lately. My thoughts and love to you that things start to get better.

Maria said...

I'm praying that Will gets better soon so you can rest and rejuvenate.

Hitting rough patches in marriage can really shake you to your core. It makes you doubt and reassess everything. Cole and I had many hard times in our early marriage, some I was convinced would break us.

I know this is an overused saying, but it truly is my favorite...this too shall pass.

Just know that you're not alone and that I'm thinking of you.

XOXO

Jen said...

Oh hon, don't worry about the lack of blogging. Obviously you have a lot going on right now. I'm sending you all my best thoughts as I hate to see you hurting in any way.

Amanda said...

No need to apologize. I just hope (and pray) that Will gets healthy soon as well as you and your hubby's relationship. (((hugs0))

Kristen said...

No apology necessary. Poor Will! I will be sending some prayers that he is back to his normal, healthy sweet self soon! XOXO

Kathy said...

Oh Katie... Big (((HUGS))) to you and Will and M. It is so hard and scary when your child is sick. It is also hard and scary when you and your husband are having difficulty getting along.

You both have had so many life transitions this year, from your struggle with recurrent pregnancy loss coming to an end (at least for now) with the awesome birth of your son Will and your transitioning from having a full time job in the professional world to becoming a stay at home mom.

Those are all HUGE life changes, not to mention lack of sleep, horomones fluctuating and all... Anyway, I imagine there is a lot more too it, but please know that I am holding you close in my thoughts and prayer as always. I hope that you and M can work this through. I know that married life, especially when you add parenting to the mix, is not easy. Hang in there. (((HUGS)))

Mrs. Piggy said...

Wow, so worried for you :( Yes, I cant say my marriage has been the same...its all about the babies, chores, exhaustion etc...
We basically co-exist...sounds like your relationship has more going on, and I hope things resolve themselves :( Glad to hear Will is on the mend...

Nurse Lochia said...

I just want to say that after my last baby, my husband and I had a Hell of a Time for about, oh, 14+ months. We argued, were not willing to listen to each other's side and a few times I really thought "this is it, we're going to split up" . Hang in there. Once we both started getting a little better sleep and had a pattern with the kids, we stopped fighting like we hated each other. Hang in there. Hoping all starts looking better soon!

Intrepidgirl said...

Hang in there. It is quite an adjustment to a marriage to have a baby. Hopefully everything will work out in a way that is good for you and your son. Wishing you the best!

Adriane said...

I am so sorry about Will being sick. That is the worst! I hope he continues to feel better and you get some needed sleep.

Wish I had comforting words about the personal issues you're going through right now. The stress of a new baby will rock any relationship. I'll be thinking about you guys.

Mel said...

You are on my heart, as always.
I hope Will gets better and I hope you know that the marriage thing... I am praying for you guys.
*hugs*

Laura said...

I hope that Will feels better soon. And as for your marriage, I truly hope that things work out soon. And no apologies are necessary. Take care of yourself and your family. You're in my thoughts and prayers!

Geohde said...

No need to apologise, really.

Also, yes, a baby wreaks havoc on a relationship. LS and I do not get on nearly as well as we did when in the trenches,

xx

g