Since You Asked. . .

Joy asked for some pictures. And I just know that the rest of you were wanting to see some, too, right?

Here are the latest too-cute-for-words pictures of Little Man!

First smile captured on film. . .

Punkin Bum - Showing off one of his FIVE Halloween costumes!

Some Puppy Love (that he is not lovin' so much) . . .

More Puppy Love (and being nakey, which he does love) . . .

Modeling another one of his costumes . . .

The Cutest Toes. Ever. . .

Will Likes. . .

Will likes. . .

to smile.

to take naps in his swing.

to coo.

to spend time on his changing table.

baths. Loves 'em.

breast, bottle, breastmilk, or formula. The kid is an eater.

being nakey.

time in the Baby B.jorn.

the hairdryer or vacuum.

napping in the car (and yes, I resort to this almost daily).

Will does not like. . .

napping in his crib, on his own.

pacifiers (unless he is in his B.jorn).

sleeping more than three hours in a row.

his yicky diaper rash.

Questions on Napping and CIO

For those of you with successful sleepers (and success in my book is anything close to a six hour stretch during the night), I have some questions!

On napping during the day. . .

Do you wake your baby(ies) from naps that go longer than three hours? Or just let them sleep?

How many hours a day would you say they get (total) from napping?

Do they sleep all of their naps in their crib (or bassinet)? Or do they get naps in swings, strollers, carseats, etc.?

And on Crying It Out (Parent Controlled Crying, Ferber, etc.). . .

What age did you start?

How long did/does your baby(ies) typically cry?

Any advice? Resources or books that helped you?

We are not really thinking about doing CIO yet. Our pediatrician and my Mom Hero Amy (IVF B/G Twins) both say no to that until 4 - 5 months when infants have the ability to self-soothe. However, I want to start reading ahead so that I am prepared if (and probably when) we need to go down that route. I am eager to hear about real life success stories and how you got there!

Oh, and our own personal success for today? I put Will down for his morning nap. . . and took a shower with the monitor in the bathroom. I kept waiting for the wail that I thought was coming for sure. Instead, by the time I was out of the shower, toweled off, and in my clothes for the day, he was fast asleep! And stayed that way for an hour and fifteen minutes! Other than that, he is napping in his swing during the day and sleeping in his crib at night.

One small victory at a time. . .

Sleepy Time Kid

Last night, a miracle occured at our house.

Will slept for five consecutive hours.

Now, that's only one night, but it is a step in the right direction.

Thank goodness!

Sleep, Hot Baths, and More?

It's amazing what just one less wake up will do for me. Will went to sleep at 8:30 and didn't wake up until 12:30. Too bad that I didn't go to bed until 9:30, but still!

He then went from 12:30 - 3:30 and then again from 3:30 - 5:30. At 5:30, M got up with him and I slept until 6:30. I almost feel human today, although I think that I would need a lot more sleep to really catch up.

My mother-in-law is coming tomorrow. I should be able to get a nap in and possibly even head to bed a bit earlier. She adores holding Will, so I don't feel guilty if I sneak away for a bit. The only problem is that I still need to be on hand for breastfeeding. While I don't mind giving him a bottle at night to "tank him up" so he'll sleep longer, or an occasional ounce or two during the day if he seems hungry, for the most part, the breastmilk seems to be doing the job. Since he eats every three hours during the day, that's probably the longest nap that I will get. But that still sounds like heaven.

Will is sleeping in his crib for another nap today! The method that I am using for getting him down is called the shush-pat, by the Baby Whisperer. It seems to work to get him down for this midday nap, but it is time-consuming, and doesn't seem to work to get him down for morning naps or later afternoon naps. It took 45 minutes to get him down today, but now he has been sleeping for well over a half hour. Usually, if I can get him past the 20 minute mark, he's down for at least an hour. Of course, nothing is guaranteed in the nap world.

I have my six week post-partum check today. Can I just tell you how much I am looking forward to getting the all-clear for a hot bath. During the IVF cycle, my clinic makes you swear off hot baths, and of course, the same was true in pregnancy. So, I haven't had a HOT bath since November! I took warm baths, mind you, and have taken scalding hot showers since delivery, but there is nothing like a steaming hot bath and a glass of wine. I hope M is up to watching Will when he gets home . . . Mama is ready for a bath!

Of course, the clearance for a bath also means that we're cleared for something else, too. I am a bit nervous about our first time following delivery. Even though I ended up with a c-section, I had a lot of stretching and exams. Now, I still wasn't torn or stretched like someone who pushed a kid out, but I am sure things got. . . shifted. . . about a bit. It will be interesting, to say the least. That is, if I can get M interested. I think he is still traumatized from the whole experience!

Getting There One Small Nap At A Time

My last few posts have been on the negative side. I am sorry for that. How many times did I read new parents lamenting about newborn woes and think, "I'd give my left arm to be up with my baby eight times a night."

I want one thing to be very, very clear. Will is my life, my world, my love. I would hold him all day and all night if that was what was best for him. Lately, however, even me holding him doesn't seem to assure that he will rest well, and not having enough sleep can be damaging to a baby's health and well being. I get to a point where I start feeling panicky as the minutes tick by and Will does not get the sleep that I know he needs. I start wondering what kind of mother cannot provide her child with the basic elements of survival.

Last night, my husband also pointed out that with as little sleep as I am getting, no wonder I am getting short tempered and frustrated. I agree that I am both of those things, but I am not frustrated with Will or even what appears to be his short sleep-cycles. I am frustrated with myself. After waiting this long and wanting this so much, I want to do it right. I want to be a good mother, I want my son to know that he is safe and loved, I want him to thrive.

The thing about these parenting books is that there are so many and each advocate a different method of parenting: attachment, cry-it-out, scheduled, demand feeding, clock feeding, Ferberize, Parent Controlled Feeding. You name it, it's out there. It makes it so difficult to feel as if you are doing anything "right," because while one book might advocate it strongly, another can make just as convincing of an argument against it. No matter what you choose, you can feel is if you are still doing it all wrong.

The good news is that each day is a different day. Each nap is a new opportunity for me to get Will to sleep. And while I wrote this, Will slept in his crib. For almost an hour now. It's a small victory, but it gives me hope that, one nap, one feed at a time, we'll get there.

Drowsy But Awake, My Arse

So, all of the sleeping books recommend putting your baby down "drowsy but awake."

Is my baby the only one that won't go to sleep this way?

I have been trying to do this for one nap a day and also at night. It doesn't seem to work with Will.

It starts out okay, in that he will lay there for a few minutes, sometimes fussing a bit or even completelyquiet. But as time goes by. . . the fussing starts and then escalates into full-fledged crying. Right now, I am staring at the monitor which has five green lights on it. I am okay if his fussing is at the one or two green light stage. When it gets to three, I start getting a bit nervous. When it is at four. . . excuse me while I go pick up and comfort my son, will you?

Okay, I am back. For the fifteenth time. The nursery is literally two steps from the office where I am typing.

The bars are already at five.

Crap. Drowsy but awake, my arse.